5 Actionable Steps to Decrease Stress and Overwhelm as a Mama [Easy & Doable!]

Feel exhausted, drained and running on empty? Overwhelmed by what’s on your To-Do List that is never-ending?

You wake up to a crying toddler, older children waking up and grouchy and you haven’t had time to get ready for a new day that’s begun. You manage to settle your toddler, help your other children get ready, and then get ready yourself and make breakfast.

From spilled juice at breakfast that goes all over the floor and walls to children arguing about who get to use the coveted flower plate to your toddler practicing his throw by launching his breakfast across the kitchen table and floor, your day is anything but calm and peaceful. Fresh, hot cup of coffee – ya that’s cold now.

I’m here to say I’ve been there and feel your struggle mama. I’ve been woken from a deep slumber from my crying baby and then by the time I got him settled my other two children were wide-wake and fighting over who’s turn it was to pick out a book first.

Day after day of feeling like I was on a perpetual hamster wheel, I realized something had to radically. I couldn’t keep going day after day this way. This daily grind was neither sustainable nor joyful.

I started learning and applying self-care and mindfulness exercises and other techniques that helped me shift from surviving to enjoying motherhood. A way of living where you meet your needs, so that you can show up for yourself and your family.

Mamas just surviving through motherhood

• Many mamas are trying to do more to get more accomplished, which only exacerbates their state of overwhelm and stress.
• Lack of taking care of yourself leads to burnout and your home environment feels chaotic.
• Pushing through your exhaustion sucks the joy out of motherhood.
• Putting everyone else’s needs first leads to resentment.
• Self-care is not selfish, but actually a way of showing love for yourself and your family.
• By putting on your oxygen mask first, you have the resources to more adequately support your family.

Why does this exhaustion and overwhelm happen?

• So many of us have been raised to believe that self-care is selfish and being a wonderful mother means always putting your children’s and family’s needs first.
• Society often creates this ideal picture of a mom: works, takes care of children and household, physically fit and looks amazing while doing it all by herself. This badge of honor to do it all without help.

I’m here to say the idea of a ‘perfect mother’ that can do it all and look fabulous and truly feel fulfilled and joyful is a lie. By pushing ourselves to do more, take care of more, with less support and, often financially supporting our families, we are becoming exhausted and overwhelmed.

More importantly than trying to keep up though, I found I was not enjoying being a mom. My life lacked joy and I felt guilty for not being present with my young children.

By implementing the following actions and finding which ones helped me feel supported, I shifted into being more present with my children, enjoyed being a mom and felt more peaceful and grounded.

5 Best Tips to Reduce Overwhelm & Exhaustion

Tip 1: Self-Care

• Create a go to list of self-care ideas that you can easily select 1 or more each day
• Do 1 self-care activity per day to start and go from there
• Some ideas: wash your face, paint your nails, shower, play your favorite song, eating nourishing meals and snacks, read from your favorite book or start a new one (even just 10 minutes)

Tip 2: Mindfulness

• Set a timer for 5-10 minutes
• Find a comfortable spot to sit or lie down
• Take nice slow, deep breaths through your nose and slowly blow out through your mouth
• Go inward and notice the feelings/sensations through your nose and mouth as you breath
• If your thoughts wonder (which mine often do), bring your attention back to your breath and the sensations you feel in your body

Tip 3: Connections

• Call a friend, family or someone who helps you feel supported and uplifted
• Text, email or write a letter to an old friend who you’ve been meaning to reconnect with
• Reach out to someone new and just be you
• Share how you’re really doing and ask for help

Tip 4: Journaling

• Buy yourself a fancy/beautiful/fun journal that get’s you excited to write
• Spend 10 minutes at night writing anything that comes to mind – free of judgement
• Just write
• List 5 things that you’re grateful for and 3 things you’re proud of yourself for each day

Tip 5: Exercise

• Put on some fun dance music and have a dance party with the kids
• Take a walk outside
• Try a new YouTube exercise video (with or without kids)
• Start with even just 5 minutes a few times per week and go from there

Conclusion

• Trying to continue doing it all, while neglecting yourself will only intensify your overwhelm, stress and exhaustion.
• The best way to take of your family and children is to first fill up your own cup, so you have the internal resources to pour into others.
• By incorporating 1 or more of the 5 tips (i.e. self-care, mindfulness, connection, journaling and exercise), you can immediately decrease feeling tired and stressed.
• Creating daily habits of taking care of yourself in as little as 5 minutes can help you feel more joyful as a mother and woman.
• Please comment below with what 1 action you are going to implement today and let me know how it helps.